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I met someone online.

I should be doing homework and studying for this physics test coming soon because Lord knows this horrible professor is not going to make it easy for us. Anyways. I’m not. I remembered someone. It’s been a long while now, but I forgot about him. Shame on me because we became such good friends. The best, actually. I was young. There was AIM. I randomly selected one SN on a list and started a conversation with him. We exchanged home addresses and began writing letters to each other. Now, this was a long time ago… when sending someone a picture was extremely poor quality and you could count the pixels…! So we sent pictures of each other.  As I moved about the country, we kept in touch. Progressed into actual phone calls that consisted of conversations about life, boys and girls, soul mates, future dreams… how much I hated my parents, food. You get the point. EVERYTHING!

I vividly remember our last conversation. I was walking home after the bus had dropped me off. I would get a regular phone call from him because I couldn’t call out on this cool cell phone, only receive (remember this was in 2004) So we talked our usual talk of “how was school baby sis” “same ol’ big bro” That was our relationship. He became my longest friend without ever having met him. I stopped getting the calls. I stopped getting letters. He stopped posting on some obscure social media blog we all had at the time. Than through links after links, I found out why he stopped calling.

Puyallup

Head-on crash kills two in Puyallup

Two people died in a head-on crash, one of them the brother of two men who were shot to death more than six years ago in the worst mass killing in Tacoma.

Hieu Le, 17, of Tacoma died Friday evening when a car slammed into an oncoming sport-utility vehicle, police said. One of the three other passengers in the same car was dead on arrival at St. Joseph Medical Center in Tacoma.

The driver was being treated at Good Samaritan Hospital in Puyallup.

A woman who was driving the SUV was treated for minor injuries, and her son escaped injury, police said.

Le was the last son of three in his family. His two brothers, Duy Quang Le, 25, and Hai Quang Le, 27, were among five people shot to death July 5, 1998, in a gang-related attack at Trang Dai Cafe in Tacoma.

Times staff and news services



I’m sorry I forgot about you old friend.. I did some research and found where you are buried… and just in case I lose my notes I’ll write it here even. Pierce County Mountain View Park. I wonder how my life would be if we had met. I miss you big bro. I wish you could see how well I’m doing and how happy I am. I wish you were here. I wish you were all here… (Duckie <3)

we coo like that&#8230; best of friends &lt;3&#160;

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You know you did great when they don’t need you anymore…  

My lovely followers, please follow this blog immediately!

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This year

Can’t wait to get neck-ed.

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Johnny: You’re not scared of anything.

Baby: Me? I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of what I saw. I’m scared of what I did of who I am. And most of all, I’m scared of walking out of this room and never feeling the rest of my whole life the way I feel when I’m with you.

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Cogito ergo sum

Have I lost the passion? As I walk through the things I have accumulated in my today life.. I’m stumbling to find a single representation of my identification. I’m damned. Well 24. Might as well be. We lose ourselves in careers.books.music.and.movies… others in drugs, alcohol or sex. I’m getting so caught up with the things I make of my life I’m having the same reoccurring fears I have had all my life. Always questioning whats real to whats not. Flip flopping whether I’m making good decisions and placing the right focus.. the right amount of time and effort on certain things.

Fuck, it’s not easy being a perfectionist. It’s just not an easy time. I’m moving.. things are in motion.. we are moving! Pinching myself… Cogito ergo sum.. “I think therefore I am”. Shit is real.. I hope I regain the heat.. the passion as I did when I was beneath the hands of God. I love Him most. Always and forever.. I just can’t find the strength to be real with myself with people (kind people @ that) that love Him just as much and more.

I pray less than I should. I love less than I show. I care less than I want. I am trying.. I need to try a bit harder. I’m happy for everyone around me and the relationships we’re building.. but its not real when I’m not happy for myself. Don’t get me wrong either.. I’m not unsatisfied with life! In fact, I’m probably at my best. Ever. I’m loving it all.. I just hate that I’m so crabby. My mentality has been dampened in that it’s been a hardened fight to care about things of the world.

Birthdays. Holidays. WHO GIVES A FLYING FUCK?! I’m sorry. That was brash and not any better. Oh is that why celebrities do charity work?? ”p Haha. So what do I do?? start presents and shit again? UGH!

I’ll begin praying.

Neglect

I still love you. I think of you often. I just don’t have time, tumblr. <3

butterfly in the sky..

yummy
sexy beast
I need this…